Sunday, September 21, 2014

Conversations with a belated blogger

Recently, I had a conference over my rather long term disappearance from cyberspace publishing.
I wish to share some of those conversations.

Me: All right everyone, I will now be taking questions from the fore.

Q:  Uhh, Ms.Liv, mam, do you think you could tell us why you have been gone from your blog so long? 

Me:  Err....One reason is my schoolwork load is obscene and I have had hardly and time to use recreational computer at all, and secondly,  when I have time, I write fan-fiction on Quotev. 

Q:  Madam Liv, I'd like to ask why you waste your time on Quotev?  

Me: (Sniff)  I'm a legitimate nerd! 

Q:  (sighs and leaves office)

Reporter #1:  (Walks in) Soooooo, miss, madam, miss'us, do you think you could give me a picture!  For the daily news?

Me: Oh, of course! (takes picture out of coat and gives it to the Reporter)

Reporter #1:  (smiles and gives the daily news to me) (leaves)

Reporter #2: (comes in)  Oh, hello, you MUST be Ms.Liv.

Me: ? Must I ?

Reporter #2: ?????....Uhhhhh...well we wanted to talk to you, we are from the press!

Me: Great, you can press my pants! (duh,dum ) 

Reporter #2:  Uh, no, we are reporters.

Me: Oh...RIIIIGHT.  Well, I just need my pants pressed, so get out of here. 

Reporter:  Well, It was wonderful to meet you.  (Shakes hand)

Me:  Thanks, it was a great experience for a nerd like me.

Reporter: Oh, well that's just-YOU"RE A WHAT?!  Smithers, get the hand sanitizer.  I'll get the
has-mat suit.  

Me: Hmmmmm.

(The door opens and a Scientist in wheelchair rolls in accompanied by a slight fellow with shaggy hair and Google glasses)

Scientist:  (through the mechanical voice created by his computer)  Hello.  Are you Liv?

Me: Why yes, yes I am.  Who might you be?

Scientist: (through computer voice) That's not important.  I was just wondering if I could borrow your Science textbook.

Me:  Sorry, but I loaned it out to Einstein years ago and he's never returned it!

Man with Google glasses:  Then might I take a look at your PC.

Me: I don't have one.  I use Apple.

(The man in Google glasses scowls and they both turn and leave.)

Me:  Those genius types are all the same.  Black holes and software, honestly.  Well, I have time with just one more appointment.

(The door opens. The Doctor and Sherlock Holmes walk in)

Me: ugh, what is it boys?

Sherlock: (blushing) Um...Can you solve this sudoku puzzle for me?

Me: (Sigh.  Takes the puzzle, solves it and hands it back to him)

Doctor: And...I need your help again.

Me: You can't be serious.  Do I need to save the world again?!

Doctor: Yeah. (looks at down at his shoes)

Me:  Alright FINE. But this is the last time okay!

(walks off with them)

The End .....for now....            





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